Raw emotion

The problem with revelations is the expectation of having to keep up with what has been revealed. If you remember, in my last blog I mentioned that I had NO IDEA how to do what had been revealed to me. And, I can say that although I have had some incredibly rich times of inspiration over the last weeks, I still feel helplessly isolated where I am.

I have been traveling quite a bit over the past months. It has been mostly good, but still taxing to be constantly on the go. I know that I’m not actually constantly on the go (there has been plenty of downtime), but to my easily-overwhelmed self, it feels like I’ve been traveling every other day. The other problem is that I find excuses to miss church on Sundays when I am actually at home. I don’t feel well or I’d rather sleep in… these are all things that have the capacity to “put me over the edge” and I subsequently miss church. But the whole point of church is to get plugged into a community. Not going makes me miss out on finding community, and feel more isolated yet.

So, this is where I’m at today. I feel alone and a little bit sad. I miss talking to my friends, all who have very busy schedules. Heck, I just miss having friends in general.